Wasn't Meant To Be

You and I once spoke of what was meant to be. The convictions in your voice as you spoke of our future almost convinced me it would happen. Vows and a lifetime together were planned, but you and I weren't meant to be. I see the happiness in your eyes that I could never put there when you look at her. I hear your voice soften in awe as you speak of her with pride. I see the smile that escapes with the sound of her voice that I never caused. When she is around you slow down and savor every moment. You tell me of the future you foresee with her that you never desired with me. A lifetime of love, hopes, and dreams that I am not to be a part of.

You and I share an unique bond. A friendship that will last the ages exists between us. You and I will forever remain close but our lifetimes belong to others.

Inner Circle

Somehow the inner circle has been broken. The bond has frayed. The circle is unwinding. Things aren't the same anymore. With time comes change and you can't prevent the course of time but try as I might I can't watch this link unravel. It is too painful to just sit by and be ripped from those who know you inside and out while they fail to pay attention. Too much work has been put into this relationship to watch it die. Too many tears have been cried in sadness and happiness. Too many memories are filed away to turn your back on. Too many moments of déjà vu and the familiar to close your eyes and pretend that this tearing apart isn’t happening. Too many dreams that have seen fruition and too many dreams waiting to be conquered. Too many accomplishments mixed with failure to have not learned that this bond is unlike anything on Earth. Yet it is simply coming apart. One by one the bands begin to break and the bond weakens.

Sometimes no matter how hard you fight life battles you and overcomes. It can be painful but change has never been easy. As hard and long as you fight sometimes you can’t be victorious. Don’t let go easily but know when the time it right and it is worth standing strong in the heat of battle or calmly backing down.

This fight is worth it. You are worth it. You are my family. You are my friends. You are the ones who held me in my darkest time. You were the ones who celebrated with me in the best of times. You laughed with me. You cried with me. You stood beside me. You supported me. You are a part of who I am and I am not ready to let you go. I might die trying to win this fight but I refuse to surrender.