You get ten seconds for jokes born in the minds of ten year old boys.
Got it out of your system? As a Patriots fan I want to believe no one in the Patriots organization had anything to do with the balls being below League regulated pressure. However, let's be honest something might have been going on. The same something might have happened to a sampling of the Colt's balls (Fact #1 most people are failing to mention). Maybe the SNL skit from a few years ago is more true than fans of the 31 other teams want to believe - Tom Brady is a miracle worker. TB12 may be manipulating the weather. After all it is really convenient when Gillette is cold, snowy, or wet in January in New England.
Before we assume anything let's reference the Wells report.
McNally: Tom sucks...im going make that next ball a fuckin balloon
Jastremski: Talked to him last night. He actually brought you up and said you must have a lot of stress trying to get them done...
Jastremski: I told him it was. He was right though...
Jastremski: I checked some of the balls this morn... The refs fucked us...a few of then were at almost 16.
McNally and Jastremski sound like two guys who can't take a little intensity. I don't know them so I am not going to presume anything other than McNally could suffer from - like almost every male I know - a smaller bladder. Seriously it has been years since I've been to the movies with a guy who hasn't had to leave the theater for a bathroom break. I'm not even making them sit through Nicholas Sparks' latest. Who leaves the Avengers?
Of course this is based only on the sampling of text messages within the report. It is probable they were trying to keep their intense QB happy by keeping his balls on the low end of the acceptable regulation as Brady has publicly admitted he likes his balls closer to 12.5 than 13.5. How the refs pushed through balls at 16 is beyond me. But again we aren't here to make assumptions. After all we wouldn't want anyone to feel it is probable (likely to be the case or to happen) there is a plausible ((of a person) skilled at producing persuasive arguments, especially ones intended to deceive) narrative of a man covering for a League suffering more bruises than a Roller Derby participant.
"He does not remember whether he began with the Patriots or the Colts game balls on the day of the AFC Championship Game."
"Although Anderson's best recollection is that he used the Logo Gauge, he said that it is certainly possible that he used the Non-Logo Gauge."
"When tested, all of the Patriots footballs—both game balls and back-up balls— registered on the lower-end of the permissible inflation range. Anderson recalls that most of the Patriots footballs measured 12.5 psi, though there may have been one or two that measured 12.6 psi."
"According to Anderson, when tested, most of the Colts footballs measured 13.0 or 13.1 psi. Anderson believes that there may have been one or two footballs that registered 12.8 or 12.9 psi, but recalls that it was 'pretty evident that their target was 13.'"
The NFL officials messed up. Oops wrong argument? I'm sorry. Fact #2 no one wants to bring up. They didn't write down the beginning measurements so we take Anderson at his word. No reason to doubt his credibility. He's an NFL official.
Anderson also stated that “we have to find the footballs.” Blakeman recalls that although Anderson is usually calm and composed leading up to a game, Anderson was visibly concerned and uncharacteristically used an expletive when the game balls could not be located. The other officials were similarly surprised and concerned.
Although the officials were concerned about the situation, with kickoff approaching, they decided to take the field.
We won't mention how the officials knew the game balls had gone missing (fact #3) but failed to maintain the integrity of the game (Fact #4). After all this would be a non-issue if they had inspected the balls before the game. An obvious situation arose and because the officials didn't have the balls to delay the game we are still talking deflated balls four months later.
I offer an alternative view for The Wells Report.
McNally:
Tom sucks...im going make that next ball a fuckin balloon
Jastremski: Talked to him last night. He actually brought you up and said you must have a lot of stress trying to get them done...
Jastremski: I told him it was. He was right though...
Jastremski: I checked some of the balls this morn... The refs fucked us...a few of then were at almost 16
"We believe that the most plausible reading of this exchange, based on the context and the evidence, is that Brady “brought up” McNally, told Jastremski that McNally “must have a lot of stress trying” to get the footballs “done” and that Jastremski told Brady that it was stressful for McNally. Jastremski‟s text message thus attributes to Brady knowledge of McNally‟s efforts to get the footballs “done” and the stress involved. We reject as implausible the reading offered by Jastremski, McNally and counsel for the Patriots that certain portions of this exchange refer to a person other than Brady."
Could it be stressful because Brady is a perfectionist and a competitor and that is a volatile combination? I imagine Brady isn't the easiest guy to work with. It doesn't take much imagination. I don't think I'd want to prep his balls for him. The southern California boy's charms will only let him get away with so much.
If I wasn't a Patriots fan I'm sure I'd be looking to tar and feather Brady much like I couldn't hide the smile when I read the news the Jets were fined for tampering. After all they've ruled the AFC East for over a decade and Brady has owned Manning. Oh did we mention his supermodel wife? Let's not forget the chin butt. My seven year old niece knows a good chin butt when she sees one.
As a Patriots fan I want to blame it all on they hate us cause they ain't us. Which isn't entirely true. Although for the rest of the AFC East it is probably 85% true.
The reality is professional sports are businesses. Their purpose isn't the game. It is winning to achieve fortune, fame, and supermodel wives. The highest-paid pick your position in pick your sport isn't necessarily the best. Actually in most sports I'd guarantee he/she isn't. They are probably more marketing than natural ability. Every pro athlete can't be a freak of nature like Rob Gronkowski or JJ Watt. I'm not trying to discount the work pro athletes put in. After all Julian Edelman is always Coaching Up. However, athletes aren't always playing for the love the game, but for the ridiculous pay days. Aaron Rodgers isn't above
A good contract might guarantee you can always buy the Cristal for your friends, but it guarantees you end up with drunk friends which doesn't necessarily mean real friends. Take a 30 second time out and think on it.
I'm sure football in Dillon, Texas might be as competitive as the NFL. Friday Night Lights was the best thing to happen to TV. I get Texas takes their football seriously. I'm not going to sidebar with my thoughts on Texas right now, but let's just say football might be one of the few things Texas has going for it.
The NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, MLS, PGA, and professional backgammon league (I made it up, I think) don't exist for a love of the game. There is an immense amount of pressure to win. Up to 13.5 psi in the NFL. Too soon? Brady and Co don't play football because they love the game and don't possess a back yard large enough for their friends to gather for a friendly competition. They play because they possess a larger competitive streak than those of us who sit on our couch and trash talk. They are willing to work out and suffer concussions to gain three yards at a time. Some of them will make barely more than a CEO of a small business. Others will make more than a dozen CEOs combined. Owners will invest millions to hopefully earn billions. A Sunday in the fall for 32 teams isn't about scoring a TD with the guys, but earning a bonus and locking in a new contract.
I don't know if Brady had anything to do with the footballs. I don't know if something nefarious actually happened. I do believe it is possible no one committed a breach of NFL rules. The Colts' balls which were inflated to a greater PSI than the Patriots' balls also fell before league regulation. (Fact #5) If there were no atmospheric effects on the footballs then who let the air out of the Colt's balls? Let's get a new investigation going. Anderson and Co. didn't check enough of the Colts' balls during halftime though. (Fact #6) The 75% they found under-inflated weren't enough to warrant a second glance?My theory is the Colts' balls didn't lose as much psi as the Patriots' because they weren't getting as much use.
At the end of a professional career, an athlete's name might be penciled into the record books. There is always a rookie yapping at their heels though. Ask Peyton Manning how his records are standing in Indianapolis. Your legacy/reputation/character is written in pen.
The Wells Report took Sharpie and wrote "liar" all over Brady's face without proof. They surmised there was a probability he had a general knowledge. I have a general knowledge of what I'd do with a million dollars. I've never been within a mile of a million dollars to my knowledge. I hate to harp but let's not ass-u-me. After all the NFL has chosen a horrible time to create a drought to wipe the mud off their face.
One of the arguments is Brady's sudden increased communication with two guys who handle his balls. Knowing what I know of males, a guy is protective of his balls and those who handle them. His increased texts asking if JJ was ok isn't surprising. It could just be a good person asking a friend if he's surviving the ride as his world is rocked upside down.
Professional sports are never going to be pure. Greed and ego will motivate players to push the limits of the rules. Coaches will get creative and walk the edge. After all if you can't beat them, whine and get the rules changed. If I want to see pure football games, I'm probably going to have to find a Pop Warner team to cheer for. I'm a Patriots fan and I will be until they begin hosting dog fights and senior executions at Gillette Stadium. It isn't as though the Patriots are the black sheep of the NFL. They just happen to inspire an intensity either for support or hate unlike any other team in the NFL currently.
Interesting development.
We might need to discount every word in The Wells Report. You can buy any results you are hoping for. Reputation matters.
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